Thursday, February 19, 2009

Addiction withdrawls...

The plan: Last year I decided I need to do a sugar detox because I have a serious addiction problem especially with chocolate. First I enlisted my support group. I have a friend and my husband doing it with me. I am fairly confident that my husband only does it at home and who knows what he does behind my back. The dirty scoundrel. Anyway. Second, I waited til the holidays were long gone and all sugar was out of the house. Well not all because the kids still eat it and I couldn't just throw what I had left over away. Third, I started the diet cold turkey. I didn't actually mean to start, I just wanted to see what the withdrawals would be like but the first few days were a piece of cake so I decided to just go with it. Okay well nothing is going according to plan but at least I had a plan.

Exceptions: I do have a few exceptions to my diet. I can have one granola bar a day and I can have sugar with my breakfast foods because I don't know what to eat without oatmeal, cereal, muffins, etc.

Goals: I am not doing this to lose weight. My goal is to release myself from this obsessive addiction that I have with the cursed chocolate. I am hoping for an increase in energy and more a stable mood. I also would like to improve my ability to concentrate and improve memory capacity (I am not sure if sugar ever hindered that but I am hoping for it anyway).

Results as of today: It has now been about 10 days and it is VERY hard. I have read up on sugar withdrawals and it talks about depressions, severe fatigue, etc lasting for weeks. The fatigue started a week ago but I kind of just shrugged it off thinking it was just a tiring day. But it is getting progressively worse and I am finding myself stuck to the couch falling asleep while reading a book to my kids. I have never been so tired in my life and I am getting plenty of sleep every night. Last night was my first 'give up' night. I have had so much temptation to quit the last 10 days and have remained fully committed but last night I couldn't go anymore. I ate a whole bag of chocolate. I got my craving satisfied and have been back on full swing today despite the fatigue. As far as depression I think I might have skipped that. I think it has actually been the exact opposite. I have been feeling happier lately. I feel the sugar was getting me down and now I feel like things are brighter than before even though Brett lost his job and once again we can't pay rent!!! Well actually I was depressed at church on Sunday because I never get spiritually edified between my calling and taking care of a 2 and a 1 year old. And I was SUPER exhausted. But I think that is it. Actually I have also been depressed because NOTHING I eat satisfies my craving, it is always just there driving me to the fridge, the freezer, and the pantry over and over!

My theory: I believe that I have been getting my energy through sugar for so many years that my body is incapable of producing natural energy. Right now my body is figuring out how to do that and that is why I am so drained. I hope it figures it out very soon.

From here: Initially my plan was to go for two weeks but from what I read online it seems that I might need an extra week especially since I haven't completely eliminated all sugars 100%. That means I am halfway done. I like to think that I am at rock bottom these last two days and that it will only get better. We'll see.


Jessica said...

I'm so sorry to hear he lost his job! Last year, I didn't eat any chocolate for a month. It was so hard, and at first I craved it ALL the time. It got a lot better, and when I did start eating it again, it was much easier to eat in moderation. Good luck, and I know you can do it!

*Jess* said...

I went on a "yeast" diet which not only takes out processed and refined sugar out of your diet, but also most carbs, that turn to sugar. I thought I was going to die on that stupid diet!! Never again. More power to you!

Camille said...

Way to go! I couldn't do that. In fact, these last few days, that's all I've wanted...chocolate. Hopefully that will decrease once this baby comes. Good luck with your goal!

Also, I'm sorry about the job! Hopefully it will bring better opportunities. This is a rough time!

Candice said...

I am so sorry he lost his job! Any luck on finding a new one yet?

Anonymous said...

I am sorry to hear about Brett's job. We are going through the same thing with Bank of America. Oh,and I am addicted to Dr. Pepper so I understand the withdrawl stuff. I think i need proffesional help to fix my issue with the DP. Good luck!